Dear Canada: As in Hockey Night Once

Once Upon a Time, there was Hockey Night in Canada – families would watch the game, often whether most of the people wanted to or not, families back then had 1 television.

There was a specific theme song that the Broadcaster and Hockey people were not pleased to have to pay the women who wrote it, even as they sought to make the most money off of it in ways that were not even imagined in the day that she wrote that little ditty tune.

Then, there was – gee, we don’t have enough ratings, we need to let Americans play in our Big Sport – I am unsure, but I think Lacrosse, invented down in the South Americas is our actual Official sport and almost no one plays it, hockey on asphalt with nets on yer stick.

Anyway, Basketball was invented in Canada – but that was taken over by Americans.

The world plays soccer and America and Canada also play a version with a ruby ball and padding. Football.

I do not like sports.

I’za bad Canuck: Hates Hockey

I do like to say, I told you so, I mean , who doesn’t right?

2016 and there are no canadian teams in the playoffs for our Stanley Cup.

It is just as well, ever since the first American win (which everyone said wouldn’t happen)

then the first time no Canadian teams played because they were too focussed on internal Canada rivalries and got overwhelmed by the American Sports Machine.

for my Canadian readers – in USA State Universities, the Sports Coaches make more money than the Governor of the state.

I do not watch sports.

CanaDUH! Hockey Hall’er The Ungreat One: Gretzky fukked a puck

the last time the Canucks played, I took the afternoon off as vacation and left Vancouver at noon. There were people walking around openly drinking beer and other soda appearing hard alcohol coolers.

The Inevitable Riot with smashed store fronts happened. and many levels of government wrung their hands and cried on their budgets.

Virtual Vancouver Hockey Riot is worse

the time before that, I was living on the North Shore – North Vancouver and I walked down to the main street to catch a bus – I had listened to the idiots in the apartment block hooting and hollering during scores, depending.

I waited on the corner and a car pulled up and 2 Classic Gay Basher Types leaned out the window and hooted “Cannuuckes” = it was a playoff they one and they were yet to loose to the New York Rangers.

“Whatever” I said and I waved my hand.

“YOu didn’t watch?” then they hurled a lot of abuse and hand gestures, engine revving in a male display of “I have a tiny penis and no self control” and speed off.

Five O – Olympics

I crossed on the sea bus and the city street was packed – wall to wall. that one caught everyone by surprise and I was lucky to get a cab driver willing to go to the arthouse movie theatre I was going to a midnight showing of. It wasn’t Rocky Horror Picture Show, it was Caligula. I do mean arthouse and not porn theatre, although that is certainly one movie where there was little difference, eh?

I let the cabbie drive and I watched the idiots out on the street celebrating a sports victory that they watched, stuffed their faces and drank themselves stupid during. Carrying over to the street.

In Europe – the fans riot and fight. In USA the players fights – and it’s really only parents of children who play these same sports that fight with other parents or other people’s kids and there’s been I think 1 murder now. Plus all the coaches molesting the children and teens and even unto the pro elite.

In Canada… sports is the best time to go to the hospital because The Mens won’t leave the tv set and will ignore symptoms.

Tennis: Boobs are bigger than Balls

Frankly, I prefer to live in a country were the most we fight over is sports.


But Queer businesses have been bombed in Canada and Queer people have been and still are hunted. We’ve only had actual legal equality for a decade.

it takes time for the people to catch up to the law.

Women have had access to abortion since 1980, yet access remains uneven across the country. We have had to defend that right and in Canada, women’s rights were not chipped away.

ever since the 1970s, growing up and playing with children who didn’t all look alike, most people can and will work and play well together – in fact, the issue is communities that self ghettoize either geographically in sparse villages in the middle of canada, or in neighbourhood enclaves within larger communities….


anyway.. we also riot at UN conferences and Trade Conferences too. Although, some of that is American Protest tourism.


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One Response to Dear Canada: As in Hockey Night Once

  1. Pingback: Dear Jenner: Return the Medals | Nina's Soap Bubble Box

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