Feb 19, 2016, I drove my Mom to take my Aunt for a doctor appointment and then back to the Elder Care Assisted/Facilitated living.
So I was out of the house for almost 90 mins, well within my tolerance and it’s okay to not push the limits every time. Staying with one’s ability means not overwhelming oneself and these little bits of okay all add up to a small success, building on several in a row, returning confidence and lowering anxiety.
So, I decided to not just make eye contact, but to try to verbalize to strangers.
At the doctor’s office an Asian Elderly man had a rather pretty jade ring, so I asked him about it, and he was very pleasant. We talked about Jade the green being from Burma with British Columbia Canada having pink jade and a bit about his travels.
I told him that I can’t fly, not that I am afraid, it’s that since I became diabetic, I have a physiological response, sorta like getting the suba bends. it gave him something to talk to the doctor about, since he’d become diabetic since the last time he’d flown to Canada 8 years ago.
He told me he found it cold here and I laughed saying that BC was the warmest part of Canada, and that born here I was boring and hadn’t traveled much outside of Canada.
The encounter over, it was back to the Elder Care Facility and I waited in lobby for my Mom.
There were a few women and 1 man in the lobby waiting to get on a bus for a lunch outing.
One of the women smiled at me and said “Life is about waiting.”
I smiled and said “It’s about Hurry Up and wait.”
The man was upset that he was the only man going on the trip, but mostly he was distressed that his Crush was missing, she had said she was going to go and this morning, she changed her mind.
The staff tried to convince him to go and I even offered that I was agoraphobic and doing something was better than sitting in your room.
He was almost convinced, but ultimately, he didn’t go – the bus full of women drove off into the drizzling rain.
I dunno. I would have liked to believe that at some point, it’s not high school, but apparently, we just age out of the system and then reinforce the social system throughout our lives.